How do preschool teachers handle aggressive behaviors?

Before we talk about how to handle aggressive behaviors, let’s talk about what behaviors are.

Behavior is a way that a child can communicate with others. All behavior, good or bad, is the way preschoolers communicate and let others know what they need. When the child begins to demonstrate problem behaviors, he must be very proactive and address the problems before the behaviors get out of control.

One of the hardest things to do is find out why your child is having problem behaviors. Behaviors are a symptom, not the answer. Caregivers have to play detectives to find out what is causing the assault, but most of the time they don’t even know what the problems are, all they know is that something is wrong with their world.

So what do preschool teachers do to control these behaviors?

1. The first thing you can do is make sure your child has a schedule. Not only to make things easier for you, but also to control the anxiety you feel. The schedules give the child the security of knowing what will happen every day at the same time. He is not going to like it because he is used to being the head of the house.

2. When you start trying to control him, his behavior will increase dramatically. He will launch attacks, refuse to stay in bed, throw things, scream, and cry. If he gets up quietly from your bed, put him back on your bed. You don’t need to explain it to them. He knows that he will no longer be able to sleep in his parents’ bed.

3. As you work through the bedtime routine, his behavior will skyrocket. He will hit, bite, kick and scream. The fact that the behavior worsens shows that you are regaining control. He is not going to like it, but if you don’t control him before he grows up, things will not go well for him.

4. As mentioned above, there is a reason for your aggressive behaviors. You will need to be one step ahead of him at all times. Have a plan ready so that when you are in the middle of a battle you already know what steps you are going to take because you are going to want to raise your hands and let him do what he wants. It becomes very overwhelming when you are in the middle of a battle.

5. Use time out. I know it doesn’t seem like it’s going to work, but if you follow the steps, you will see the difference. Here’s an example: Your child hits someone on the playground. The teacher walks up to him where she had just thrown sand into one of the girl’s eyes. Hopefully, as part of your plan, you have found a place to rest. When you get to him, just say “no knocks”, take him to the reclining chair and sit him down. You don’t say anything else. When he stumbles to get up and run, you catch him and say, “There’s no running away from me.” Take him back to the chair. This can take hundreds of times, but be consistent and don’t give up on it. When his time out is over, give him a hug and have him tell the other child he’s sorry.

So what do you think is their motivation? He wanted it in his own way and you started making rules. The normal tactics you’ve used in the past don’t work, making you feel insecure. What he does not know is that you will continue like this. This will work for home and school; you just have to train the staff.

Please note that this will be an ongoing way to discipline him. Most likely it will start with behavior problems and when you do time out again, the behavior problem will increase. Teachers and parents should be prepared that he will go to great lengths when he realizes that everyone is working together and he has to follow the rules. Behaviors aren’t going to change overnight, but if you keep doing what I’m teaching you, it will work. It can take a month or two to see the full impact of changing those problem behaviors. Not to mention that as it grows, things are going to change and you will have to figure out once again what the problems are.

Could this be your son? Leave comments and questions. I will update quite frequently, so keep checking back!