Duckbill common sights

One of my favorite games is playing with words. The use of fodder instead of forge, as “lit fodder”, attracts stars, laughter, and occasional bewilderment. Raising both hands and announcing that I am “amphibious” elicits the same bewilderment as “Are you serious?” to “Wow! Maybe I’ve been using the wrong word?” to “Poor, confused dear”. All of this just amuses me. I have to wonder how funny I really am, but then I think I can at least laugh a few times while playing my vocabulary rich game.

The platypus is a semi-aquatic mammal that lays eggs. It has a broad tail and webbed feet and its snout resembles a duck’s bill. Now if that’s not some crazy conglomerate of an animal, I don’t know what is. If mammals have live young, how do the eggs get in? If a duck lays eggs and has webbed feet, why isn’t it a mammal? How can you determine that a “snout” is a duckbill? Well scientifically it all makes sense as each feature is identified and then classified. Of course, the platypus with its variety of interesting features is a swimming egg layer that suckles its young. This diversity captures the imagination and sparks curiosity.

This is also true for topics. While defined as commonplace platitudes and overused clichés, platitudes also offer guidance advice. Do unto others… , Do not make a mountain out of a molehill, and other similar quotes create images and serve as role models. These produce a common language that adds to understanding within a culture. Although many of these sayings are not translated, for example, it’s raining cats and dogs, they do provide insight into the thought. The French are realistic, Il pleut a ver: it’s raining a lot, but the American version is much more graphic. Watch out for falling kittens and puppies!

A duck bill is rounded; a duck emits confused quacks and rustles. The noise is characteristic. A bird scientist could probably identify the tonal variations of duck species, but I only hear redundant dispute. Whether my webfooted friend is chasing a duck to mate and running after morsels of food, it all sounds the same to me. A flapping of wings with a splash of water adds to the resonance creating a unique and wonderful reverb. There is nothing like a duck.

And now we have the unit of the two: duckbill – quackery and quackery – and platitudes – bullshit of the day when someone blathers along offering advice and insights that may be useful or just providing boring information and non-stop babble. While someone offering platitudes might draw a picture of a suit and tie and a finger wagging with profound instruction, the picture seems prosaic and a bit boring. One more lecture, one more list of do’s and don’ts, one more speech on how to live life, whether it matches my beliefs or not, and many times, one more humiliation. Who needs this?

Now summon the deliverer of wise advice dressed in a tuxedo (a bit like a penguin, I know) with flapping wings and a snapping beak as they’re spoken aloud. The laughter in the scene allows me to listen happier with a smile on my face (or one hidden behind my teeth) and a nod that appears to agree when in fact it indicates total disbelief and doubt. This vision tingles my spine as it adds excitement to my mind, knowing that I can endure the tirade politely and then turn around and walk away with no hurt feelings, no feeling of being stepped on, just a bad impression.

I hope that this word game has been useful to you and that perhaps a smile will come to your face. At the very least, I believe that the next time someone is expounding on a topic you don’t care about, or someone is “giving you advice” in the form of telling you what to do, you’ll be able to tolerate it with dignity just like you. evoke this delicious and strange image.